dante woo
original content by dante woo since 1998.
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Invoke Concentration

Holy Arrow of Extend Due Date

Portal to Library

Banish Procrastination

Summon Term Paper

Fireball

- DANIEL MANNING, "Live-Action Role-Playing Spells I Could Really Use, Right Now," mcsweeney's april 8, 2005 (via the manpanion)

posted April 08, 2005 in print


i'm stoked, mates

i got a job! doing real-live journalism! and earning only slightly less than what i made on the sunday shift at costco in high school!

posted April 08, 2005 in delivery


asiaphile turns to the dark side

A white male Princeton grad student has confessed to cutting locks of hair from nine Asian American female students without their knowledge, as well as pouring his urine and semen into the drinks of Asian female students on more than 50 occassions. Real smooth.

[ed: and there's video]

- lisa, "yuck," hyphen april 7, 2005

posted April 08, 2005 in print


things to loathe

so i'm helping bloggy out with artcal. updating gallery listings is a nice change from the rest of the week (i.e., looking for a summer internship, balking when you're offered one, pulling a feature story on wal-mart outta yer ass, trying to get your editor to let you do a story on paul wall's grills bidness, writing a 'think piece' [prof's words, not mine] on "sin city," then turning around and pitching it before the movie is reviewed to death. and repeat), but these faux-cerebral press releases are off the chain. observed:

- chronic misuse of "comprise"
- PDFs that are clearly just word docs squirted through acrobat, bungling my firefox tabs
- inability to say what the artist made in a straightforward way (e.g., "xxx's painterly reliefs compel the viewer to attend not only to the works’ objecthood but also to the evidence they give of their own process of construction and to the process through which they are perceived."
- are you ever displeased to announce something?
- your site is so crappy, why are you including the URL? (SUB-ISSUE: y'know that flash website that you probably paid dearly for? it is un-googlable, individual pages are un-bookmarkable, the text is un-copy/pastable, the images are un-downloadable, and is generally unlovable, orbiting the interweb in lifeless, unfindable obscurity. Even worse are galleries that just slap a JPG on their homepage.)
- i get in trouble with my editor when i use words like "posit" where "say" or "think" would work. so should you.
- "utilize" is a bad, bad word

- i'm thinking of more...

posted April 08, 2005 in art, delivery


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